Why were we attacking Dol Amroth again?
Oh. Because Éowyn said so. And as she is my good friend/ally and my favourite King other than myself... yeah. Bad bad Dol Amroth.
I AM NOT A CARTOON ANY MORE. Must celebrate. Later. First, must come up with plan for revenge on the individual who laughed at me the most when I was.
Also planning to get in a big fancy-schmancy ship with a huge banner and sail to join my fleet... only Wolfgang took all the big fancy-schmancy ships. And the sight of the King in a rowboat is not one that inspires armies to victory. So I did what any great man does in a situation like this. I CALLED MY MOTHER!
Elwing: ARR, what?
Elros: Hi mama!
Elwing: Elros! What?
Elros: Um. Hi?
Elwing: Whadda ya want?
Elros: Er, well, you see...
Elwing: Arr, shut up and answer my question.
Elros: Well, like, um, I, well, there's this war... andWolfganghasalltheboatsbut- Ineedtogosailtojointhefleetinareallybigb
Eärendil: (in the background) Who?
Eärendil: My mother?
Eärendil: Still drunk?
Elwing: NO, it's our son.
Eärendil: Which one?
Elwing: The younger one.
Eärendil: Oh! Hi Elrond!
Elwing: ELROS is the younger one. Arr.
Elwing: (the rolling of her eyes was audible.) Sorry about that. What were you saying, boy?
Elros: Can you, um, like, come pick me up in dad's shiny boat and take me to Dol Amroth?
Elwing: ...Bloody kids never grow up always driving them around like a fucking chauffeur grumblegrumble etc. Sure, kid!
So that's what happened. I'm on the dock waiting for my parents, who are going to take me to Dol Amroth. Okay, I know being driven around by my parents isn't very kingly, but it's better than the rowboat, right? I swear, though, if she starts asking if I remembered my toothbrush, I am jumping overboard and swimming right back here.
Shit. I forgot my toothbrush.